Irrational Body Expectations!
Apr 25, 2019
As I get older, I have learned to love my body. I try to accept the things about it that I once hated! Yes, I also hated many parts of my body. My whole life I grew up thinking my booty was too big, and I had too much cellulite. I could never find a pair of jeans to fit me because my waistline is super small, but my booty and thighs are not! I literally went through high school covering my back side at all times! And yet, I look back and can’t believe how small that booty truly was!
Today, as I coach hundreds of clients to help them lose weight and/or get in the best shape of their lives, I realize that what is troubling most people is BODY EXPECTATIONS! Instead of focusing on the healthy body that we are blessed with, we focus on what we don’t have and what we wish we looked like! This is largely due to the fact that social media is in our face all day long. We see pictures of stars or even friends posting their VERY BEST angle. We see people posting about the 20 pounds they lost in a week on some fad diet (although they never post how they put 30 pounds back on the following month). Let’s face it, we are becoming saturated with information about one’s body whether it is realistic or even healthy.
I think instead of having body dysmorphia (a mental disorder characterized by an obsessive preoccupation that some aspect of one’s own appearance is severely flawed and warrants exceptional measures to hide or fix it), people are showing more signs of what I am calling Irrational Body Expectation Issues. I coined that phrase myself… ha!
So, how do you know if you have this issue?
- You compare your body to your friend, family member or star in a magazine/TV/movie!
- You expect PERFECTION! You think if your arms, stomach or booty are not PERFECT, then, they are AWFUL or fat.
- You see the number on a scale as GOOD or BAD.
- You think the scale should stay at ONE number daily…the number you somehow chose as your PERFECT number. And if you get on the scale and don’t see that number, you think you are fat.
- You think all types of clothes and styles should look good on your body and if they don’t…you are fat.
- You think cellulite is only on people who are overweight.
Do any of these signs/symptoms sound like thoughts that go through your head? If so, maybe it’s time to reset your Body Expectations.
Here is how:
- Stop comparing your body to anyone else’s body. EVERYBODY IS DIFFERENT! And definitely do not compare to anyone in a magazine. Those are airbrushed and photographed at just the right angle. That is not REAL LIFE. I think this quote about comparison says it all: ““Comparison is the death of joy.” Mark Twain’
- Stop expecting perfection. Perfection does not exist. Be kinder to yourself. If you have kids, do you look at their body and think “I wish her abs were tighter” or “He really needs more muscle tone in his arms”. Of course not! You look at your child and think “he/she is PERFECT”. So why don’t you show yourself the same kindness? It’s not about being perfect, it’s about being healthy.
- Stop defining yourself and your day by the number on the scale. A number does not define you. You are not a good person if you have a good “weigh in” or a bad person if that number goes up. These numbers are just information.
- Give yourself a goal range for your weight, not a single NUMBER. You can’t stay at one solid weight daily. So, if you see the scale go up and down daily you should know that is NORMAL! I tell my clients NOT to weigh in more than 2x/week (Monday and Friday). If you weigh in more than that, you have to be okay with the fact that the number will go up and down every single day. We have hormones, sodium and many other stressors that affect our weight each and every day. So, if your goal is 135 pounds, try giving yourself a goal range of 133-137.
- Guess what, not all clothes are right for all body types! Sometimes there is a style that just won’t match your body. That is okay! It does not mean you are overweight. It just means that particular fashion does not flatter your body. There are many fashions that don’t work for me. SHORT SHORTS are one of them! I don’t feel comfortable in them and don’t think they flatter my body type. I don’t think this makes me fat or out of shape. I think it just means short shorts are not great on my body. Strapless anything does not look great on me as well! I have no boobs (ha!). This does not mean I’m not a woman or unsexy. I just have a flat chest which means strapless tops do not flatter my body type. Stop the negative self-talk and just move on to the next fashion trend. (That being said, make sure you listen to this episode on Podcast where I SLIP my own negative self talk! I could have edited it out, but I would rather be REAL with my listeners. We all struggle with these things..even me. CLICK HERE for Podcast Episode!)
- Don’t get me started on Cellulite. It’s genetic. It’s not a sign of being fat. I have it. I’m very fit. It does look better if you are not carrying extra weight, but likely if you have cellulite you will always see it even when you are at your skinniest phases of life! Stop judging the cellulite. Embrace it. It’s part of you and you were born with it. I’m not interested in hearing about the cellulite creams or rollers that fix it. If any of those worked, no one would have cellulite today. Am I right? The only thing that makes cellulite better is a tan (#truth) ha!
So, now that you see how we have set ourselves up to fail daily with our BODY EXPECTATIONS, what are you going to do about it? Start changing your words in your head about your weight, your body and yourself. We need to have more positive self-talk to make positive changes in our life. Speak to yourself as you would to your own child. Let’s promote SELF LOVE and HEALTH more than anything! It is my goal to help each and every person who struggles with their weight. I want to help people lose weight to be healthy and do it in a healthy, sustainable way. With that, I want to show them that feeling good through health is more important than any number on the scale.
If you want more details about this topic, check it out on the Earn That Body Podcast where I go into a bit more detail and personal experience! CLICK HERE!
If you need help with diet/nutrition, check out these program options I offer online:
1 Week Meal Plan: Eat By Example: CLICK HERE for details.
The ETB TOX On My Own Program (starts the first Monday of every month). Get your nutrition cleaned up and dialed in! CLICK HERE for details.
Signature Earn That Body Program and Private Nutrition Sessions. CLICK HERE for details.
I design all programs to help you get HEALTHY! It’s not just about the number on the scale. Feel free to email me: [email protected] to figure out which program might be best for you.